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am i asking for too much

Wednesday. 07. 29. 2009.

Yarg. I have a stomach ache now. I ate too fast and stewed for too long.

I spent at least the last hour cleaning our kitchen. You may wonder why I was cleaning our kitchen at 9am.

Well… let’s just put it as, I’ve had enough of the counters being so cluttered that we keep breaking glasses ’cause there’s no space for it and despite having friends over on SATURDAY, the kitchen was still a mess.

Sometime ago, I remember reading an article about how family equality is not really equality yet. Here’s an article from The New York Times.

Now I’m not saying that I’m little miss perfect. I’m far from it. But I am trying. I also have certain expectations for certain things. Like having a clean kitchen because that’s where the food usually is and if the kitchen isn’t clean, then you have unpleasant visitors like silver fish and other creepy crawlies.

At the present moment, I’ve been working nearly every day of the week and to be honest, I’ve been slacking a bit here and there. Usually I kind of save it to Sunday because that’s when I usually have the day off and since it’s summer, that’s when Fredrik’s usually gone.

But lately I wonder if it’s too much to ask for when I “expect” him to just tidy up a bit while he’s at home and I’m at work.

I mean yeah, we had friends over on Saturday and he gave the house a clean. But really, that’s about all the cleaning that gets done. Ouuu… he cleaned the coffee table. Now there’s piles of stuff on the floor. Yes. He cleared off the dinner table so that we can have said dinner there. But now everything is in piles on our bedroom floor.

To be totally honest, I think I’ve given up on trying to get him to just pitch in. I’ve tried to discuss it with him, I’ve tried bitching him out. But what’s the point when he just doesn’t seem to care? I mean who the hell stacks the big pan on top of the little pans?

I understand that being on tour, other people clean up after him. He doesn’t have to care about the dirty dishes after his dinner or does he have to care about whether or not someone vacuums the lounge on the bus. But the unfortunate thing is that when he’s at home, it’s either him or me that does that sort of stuff.

When I wasn’t working and not studying very much, I was ok with it all. I mean, he is earning the income of the household. The least I can do is keep things clean around the house. Not that I had very much to do anyways. But now I’m working also and in August, I’ll start full time school and continue working. It just would be nice if he could give me a hand with the things that need to be done around the house. What is going to happen when I get into dental school and have to study even more? Or when I’m a dentist and will be working just as much if not more than him?

All this has lead me to the decision that we’ll be getting a maid.

So here are my current options.

  1. I become a full time housewife. I quit my job, stop school, perhaps pop out a kid or two. My mom was a housewife. My dad supported her in comfortable settings for over 19 years. I’m expecting at least that sort of standard.
  2. I continue studying and working. He hires a housekeeper/maid.
  3. I continue studying and working. He helps out at home and realizes that he’s not living in a hotel or on tour.
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